Midnight Musings #2

Welcome back to Midnight Musings! It’s almost 5AM and I haven’t slept. Is probably a combination of the fact that my shitty job has seriously fucked my sleep schedule, thankfully i am going to be quitting very soon, and the fact that I can’t stop thinking. The sad thing is that its about a boy that has completely ghosted me. Really I should take a hint, right? Like obviously he doesn’t want to talk to you so you should just let it go, but you see the thing is I was really vulnerable with this guy and told him how I felt and he was like I just want to be friends and that was a 100% okay with me cause I really like talking to him and being his friend. I even told him why I took me so long to tell him because I have told male friends that I like them in the past and they always cut me out after I tell them and he said he didn’t plan on doing that to me. Well shocker of all shockers I guess he plans on it now it really fucking hurts. Fuck feelings they get me nothing and no where, well they bring me pain. I need to let it all go. I need to forget it and not worry about and I will. Once the deadline has passed I won’t spear it one more thought. God I though he was different. I wanted him to be different. Best part is I know he has the link to my blog. I wonder if her reads it? I wonder if he will see this? If he does know that I don’t appreciate being ghosted and if something is going on with you that caused you to ghost me then you can talk to me and if you ghosted me just because you didn’t want to deal with me or be my friend anymore or my feelings scared you then fuck you you’re a coward and not the person I thought and hoped you were. In other news I have a job interview in 5 1/2 hours so wish me luck with that. I’m going to crawl into bed and try to get at least 2 or 3 hours of sleep.

Tiger’s Destiny (Tiger’s Sage #4) by Colleen Houck

We have reached the end of the curse and things get HOT! The fourth and final task involves quite a lot of fire for our intrepid heroes. There are magical artifacts to retrieve and love triangles to resolve. In the grand scheme of the series Destiny is my 4th favorite with in the series. The ending is weird for me cause its the ending I wanted, but I’m not really pleased with circumstances of it. Up in till 2018 this was the final book in the series and thus the last book in the series that I am rereading. Rereading this series has kinda shown me how much I have grown since 2012 when Destiny came out. I used to be a lot like Kelsey in the way that she is very insecure in who she was and in her relationships. Something that 16/17 year old me definitely identified with, because I was very insecure growing up and not just about my appearance but about everything really. To me Kelsey embodies 17 year old me that is if 17 year old me had two really hot Indian princes fighting for my attention, which shockingly never happened. Now rereading them as a 24 year old women who has gone through what I have been through and learning to love myself as I have I just don’t really identify with her anymore as a heroine or a character. That being said I still love the world and the series as a whole and I think it will always be one of my favorites. Also I am not going to lie I have been procrastinating this review… So I like may or may not have finished this book like a month ago and read five other books since (I totally did). I gave this one a three stars and I honestly don’t remember a lot of how I felt about the plot, other then how I felt about the ending and the characters overall. So lets talk about that.

So again as in Voyage there were several times where Kelsey was quite literally forced (like gun to your head kinda forced) to admit her true feelings for Ren and yet she stubbornly stays with Kishan. A fact that really rubbed me the wrong way especially in the end. I love Kishan as a character. I think at of all of them he has the most character development. He honestly could have been a bit more broody, but he goes from being a self exiled tiger to a man who has learned not only how to be human again but how to love again. He deserves more then what Kelsey gave to him. To Kelsey he was the safe choice, the back plan if you will, and to Kishan Kelsey was the world. I just feel like he deserved more then what he got. Nobody, fictional or otherwise, deserves to be a second choice. Its not a cool move and not only does it make you a coward for not facing your own feelings, but it makes you a jackass for giving somebody hope for something that is basically completely doomed. Not that Kishan didn’t have his flaws cause he did. Bro Code Rule #1: Don’t try and seduce your brothers girlfriend; even I know this and I’m a female and an only child and Kishan did it TWICE! Overall I felt Kelsey to be kind of a weak character, I mean she fights (kinda), but mostly she just gets rescued and then laments about how she can be with the love of her life because he will leave her (which honestly her proves to her that he would never do that in like the first book. It literally took a mind sweep and intense physical pain to make him not date her and even then he never actually left her so she trippin’). Ren wasn’t exactly the Prince I fantasized about as a young teenager. He was demanding, a bit controlling and although his conviction to be with Kelsey was always there he made choices that pushed her away and forced her to “attempt” to get over him and when it came down to it he choose his happiness over both Kelsey’s and Kishan’s. I will give him that it was hella obvious that she was still madly in love with him and would have been way happier with him then with out him, but since Kelsey was absolutely atrocious at communicating ANYTHING he knew nothing for sure for sure so its still kinda a dick move.

SPOILER ALERT (and completely not shocking at all): Ren and Kelsey end up together. Only because Ren absolutely refuses to be Durga’s tiger and leave Kelsey and if I am being completely honest with the way its written Kishan wouldn’t really have had much of a choice anyway even if Ren was willing to sacrifice cause it was pretty clear that Durga (Anamika) and Kishan had a connection that rivaled Kelsey and Ren’s. The one thing that I did find a bit shocking (at least the first time I read) was that Kelsey and Ren get married like only 6 or 7 months after leaving Kishan behind in the past. Like maybe press a slow down button and decompress form 2 years of fighting mythical creatures and 300+ years of being a weartiger maybe? Plus at the beginning of the series Kelsey had just turned 18 I believe and by the end I believe she is only 20 so like maybe talk 1 or 5 years to explore a relationship that doesn’t involve almost being killed. It just felt like Kishan was this afterthought and I didn’t particularly like it. Another character that I personally thought was pretty weak was Lokesh. He obviously played some kind of part in the story especially at the beginning but honestly he wasn’t needed. I he was boring and very one dimensional. He didn’t really have any motives other then power which is always a goal of a villain but like it was his only motive and he really didn’t go after it in a way that would have made him a more formidable foe. He was just blah to me.

July 15th 24 Hour Readathon

UPDATE (July 16th): I got zero reading done yesterday! I was a bit over ambitious and after working on my bullet journal and doing laundry yesterday morning I had worn myself out and decided to take a nap which turned into me waking up shortly before meeting my friend for some shopping and then spending they day with her. When I got home I basically crawled into bed and just scrolled on the phone and was asleep by 10. All these books are still on my July TBR though and I do plan on finishing most of them before the month is out.

Good Evening! Morning? Either way I have to reset my sleep schedule because on of my oh so lovely coworker decided to no call no show this week so I got to work six shifts in five days this week and working 16 hours straight throw my very delicate sleep schedule into a tizzy. So in order to accomplish this I have decided, in all my infinite wisdom, have decided that a 24 hour readathon was the perfect way to accomplish this. It also service the dual purpose in allowing me to get ahead in my reading list. I bet another one of my co-workers $50 that I couldn’t read 60 books in a year and I am a bit behind. But I am determined to win that money.

So I have a bit of an ambitious TBR (5 Books) but I figure its better to be ambitious then under estimate yourself. Right? I am 56 pages into Daughter of the Pirate King by Tricia Levenseller so I plan on finishing that today and then moving on to the squeal Daughter of the Siren Queen. Also in my TBR pile is Girl at Sea by Maureen Johnson, Sugar Skulls by Lisa Mantchev & Glenn Dallas, and The Beholder by Anna Bright. I also have some things I have to take care of today , Like laundry and some serious quality BFF time with my bestie. So I’ll be happy if I get through half of my TBR. So I guess wish me luck and I will keep y’all updated!

Tiger’s Voyage (Tiger’s Saga #3) By Colleen Houck

Voyage is my favorite of the series because of two things: dragons and yachts. If I ever find myself in possession of A LOT of money you best believe I am going to buy a very large yacht and just sail around the world with all my books. Alas that is not how my life is destined to turn out but at least I can live vicariously through Ren, Kelsey and Kishan. Our intrepid heroes are out to find Durga’s third gift and give the boys another 6 hours back. A lot happens in this installment of the series, actually before Dream was published last year Voyage was the longest book in the series by about 100 pages. We have to deal with Ren being a complete jerk, Kelsey being dense, Kishan being oblivious, and then of course a Kraken, a mega-shark, dragons and Lokesh.

Even though it is one of the longest books in the series it is the most action packed. With both Quest and Curse there were some definite lulls in the story where not much was happening plot wise. Quest is especially guilty of this as I would say a good 10 to 15% of the novel was Kelsey and Kishan doing mundane things around the house. Voyage on the other hand throws are heroes into it. Maybe its because they have to get a lot more magical creatures in this book then they do in the other two but it makes for a way more interesting read in my opinion. I also loves the inclusion of Asian mythology tied in with the Indian mythology already there.

Lets talk about out intrepid heroes shall we. Let me count the ways that Kelsey annoyed me: SHE IGNORES WHAT HER HEAD AND HER HEART AND LITERALLY EVERYONE AROUND HER SAYS! There are several parts in this story where she has to admit her true feelings for Ren and then she’s just like “nah brah I’m going to stay with Kishan cause he won’t leave me.” Which is not okay! Ladies some life advice if you are with somebody because you are scared of your feelings for someone else and the person your with is just the more “comfortable” choice then you are doing yourself a disservice and you not being fair to them. It is not okay! There are a couple of times during Kelsey’s inner monologue where she tells her self that Kishan isn’t a second choice hes just a different choice but then she’ll follow it up with something along the lines of how in love with Ren she is and that it scares her and I’m always like oh honey, HE’S YOUR SECOND CHOICE! Throughout the story she treats him like he’s her second option and really Kishan is just too dense to realize the it is painfully obvious that she is completely in love with Ren. I think one of the reasons that I love Kishan so much is that he is like a jealous person but he’s also kind of blind at the same time. Like when Kishan is being all lovey dovey on Kelsey and Ren is there to witness Ren wants to tear him apart, but when its reversed Kishan only notices like 50% of the time which is kinda hilarious. Other then Kelsey’s love life being an absolute mess she was kinda bad-ass in this. I mean she tricked not one but 2 dragons into helping her. She also kicks some Kraken and Mega Shark butt. Ren was also relatively annoying here. So for the first 3/5ths of the book we are still dealing with Ren’s memory block and let me tell you hes kind of an ass about it. Like I get it, it is physically painful for him to be around her but dear god he doesn’t have to be such a jerk about it. I think the thing that bothered me the absolute most is when Ren and Kelsey tries to date again and then he cant physically save her so he dumps her in the most asshole way he can pushes her on his brother and then parades the the most annoying women known to man in front of her and then gets his memory back and then expects her to jump right back into his arms. Like bro NO! That is not how this works. To Kelsey’s credit she didn’t jump when he said jump but nor should she have stayed with Kishan. (Although I’m not going to lie I still want Ren and Kelsey together.)

Voyage to me is the best installment of the series. If was going to put them in order from favorite to least favorite it would first. The plot is a lot more enticing and the characters grow more to me. I think the only other thing that I dislike is that Lokesh plays more of a role in this installment then the other two. He was introduced in the first one and kept Ren captive in the second, but he also didn’t really play a part past that. To me he is no that strong of a villain and feels like more of an after thought when it comes to the curse and breaking it. Like he’s hunting them down but hes not really trying to stop them from breaking the curse and he’s not trying to find Durga’s gifts to have the power for himself. His entire world domination plan is a bit vague and he’s not as scary as Houck wants him to be. But overall a great third installment!